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I think it depends on each dealership, not all of them don't know what they are doing. Some that I've called have even said they deal with rattles...
Don't go by wattage alone. A premium 35w kit (think Morimoto, Xenon Supply, KLight) can be just as bright as a low end 55w.
I do t think toyota is trying to protect anything with these pieces. They are just trying to use it as a selling point - like, "the car comes with...
This one is way easier. You are only cutting plastic in one place, not metal and then another area of plastic like that mod.
Ground shadows are just due to the ground wire orientation on the bulb. You can get cheap $12 HID bulbs on eBay that produce. no ground shadows....